Gave another c-note to Bernie; puns...many, many puns...follow:

Just post-Biden-launch; this won’t be a regular habit on top of the c-note a month we’re throwing down now. And also because a funeral prevented me from doing my Bernie launch party, sadly. 

Meanwhile, I’m just Biden my time till Joe flames out, despite near-complete elite backing, which, if you care about reality and policy responses to reality as opposed to elite gravy trains, is totally un-Warren-ted. He will MayorPeter out, I think and hope, despite being presented as un-Beto-ble. 

I find it utterly Hillary-ous that the establishment Democrats are pretending, as they nibble their nails down to bloody stubs in private, that Senator Credit Card-Iraq War-Crime Bill-Fleshrubbing-Gaffe-Machine is The Solution. I’m just waiting for him to stick to his guns and disallow bussing in people of color to his rallies, while Strom-ming on his old banjo, if ever he has any outside a billionaire’s home. And I am enjoying how Maddow the Usual Suspects are getting at Sanders, his policies, his wing of the party, and the base—they’re just Berning with envy and rage, and they’ll be Russian him into oblivion if at all possible. 

Killing the progs off Trumps every other consideration they have, after all. Even unto Pelosi meeting with Labour defectors and refusing to protect Omar till browbeaten.

But, as Paul McCartney once sang about Pelosi in that classic Beatles tune, “The Continuing Tales of Cocky Buffoon"— 

Now somewhere in the black fetid swamp of the Beltway

There ruled a woman named Cocky Buffoon

And one day her Party ran off with a scruffy guy

Hit that Cocky in the eye

She said, “I’m gonna get that boy”

So next day she walked into town and

Booked herself a room with the nation’s tycoons…

Cocky Buffon walked into that room

Only to spitball some libel

Cocky had come, equipped with Dave Frum,

To shoot off the legs of her rival

Her rival, it seems, had broken her schemes

With Feeling-the-Bern necromancy

Her name was, “A Shill,” and her goal was, “standstill,”

But everyone knew her as Nancy

Now she and her hoe, who called himself Joe,

Hit all the swank rooms for the throw-down
Cocky Has-Been was grinning a grin,

She said, “Biden, boy, this is a showdown"

But Biden lacked thought; he drew first and shot

Through his foot and collapsed, as was former

Now the Mayor came in, stinking of spin,

And proceeded to lie and tell fables

He said, "Sanders, you met your match"

And Sanders said, "Pete, you’re only a patch,

“And I run better, I run better, than you’ll ever be able”

Now, Cocky Buffon reserved a new room

Only to spitball some libel

Beto’d checked out, so Pete’s left with no doubt

To help with good Cocky's revival

Puns for Bernie 2020! Make Language Grate Again!

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